So Ive been away for a while. Changing cities calls for a change in mindset, timings and overall personality in my view. The recent week has been pretty hectic with me joining telenor Pakistan on the Djuice brand...and God do I love it!
Having said that, that isnt the subject of this post.
My last days in Karachi turned out to be some of the greatest moments of my life and I had really cool friends give me a totally new perspective on life. You know how we all talk about firsts in life? Ive figured out a better perspective...
My last days were spent saying goodbyes. Goodbyes may be emotional although us "men" dont like showing emotion even if we do get emotional at times. There was Saadis last match with IBA United, My last dinner with her and then my farewell lunch with a bunch of friends.
What was my major learning? It was how to make your last moments...last. Make your last moments lasting enough to be remembered as fond memories. So to everyone at the hostel, in college, at the match, at the dinner and at the lunch...thank you.
You made my last moments in K-town, Everlasting!
So ive been pretty good at quitting things all my life....not that it makes me a serial quitter, but i guess youll get the point after reading the rest of the post..
i quit tennis as a kid because the coach just kept me on wall practice for a month and i had just had enough of it. I quit learning the harmonium because i just found it too boring and i quit the gym because lets be honest, its just too god damn tiring...
The next thing to quit wont be all that easy. Ive decided to quit tobacco. It wont be easy, heck ive already quit it 20 times.
The fact is, frankly im sick of it. Im sick of waking up every morning and reaching for my suicide pack. Im sick of needing to smoke every time i need to think and my life has somehow become a smokescreen with it. I hate the fact that I cough more often than not, and my throat has become a prime target for any virus that can be found. Im tired of not being able to run anymore, im tired of not feeling healthy and happy 24x7. The horrible thing about tobacco is that it becomes like a crutch for smokers. Once you get addicted, you depend on the death sticks to cure your boredom or any other challenge that you encounter in your daily life. Frankly, I think Allah made me stronger than that, and wanted a different path in life for me.
But the strongest motivation comes from my mother and how it makes her so unhappy that her son is a smoker. At first I thought shed get over it, but when I eventually found out that both my grandfathers (maternal and paternal) had died due to smoking I now understand why it hurts her and my father so much. Sure the fact that my doctor told me that I was a prime candidate for emphysema matters too, but I think a mothers feelings are a much stronger motivation than any other in this world.
Im actually thinking of starting a blog to right down my daily emotions so that other quitters can benefit from my experience. What do you think?
Oh and yes. I would appreciate your support in this trying time. It wont be easy, and jabbering on about how Ill never be able to quit will never help my cause.
Lets see how this goes! Wish me luck.
D-Day 18th June 2010 - My first day without smoking.
Sir,
After reading the article that I just sent to you, I got down to thinking. How will IBA in an increasingly unstable world be able to differentiate itself?
I believe that values and ethics and creativity of business solutions is the way to go. IBA has previously been known for supplying the market with cut throat executives that will do just about anything to succeed. However in view of the financial crisis, its evident that such a strategy will not work.
Since Islam has always taught tolerance, values and ethics, I personally believe that IBA can become a shining beacon of such a system and this is something that I have realized after having been taught by Dr. Mahnaz Fatima this semester. The approach that she has taken with corporate strategy is one that cannot be found in any other business school in Pakistan, and I believe that she is a real asset to our institution. However one thing that is fundamentally wrong with the MBA right now is that we had her in the last semester, rather than in the first.
When the new crop of MBAs/BBAs come to IBA, they come here hungry for success in the corporate world. That is exactly why the race for grades has become the order of the day amongst our students. If they were to be given lessons in values by Dr. Mahnaz in the first semester, I am sure that this mindset can change. The way she has taught my class, and myself included, has really changed our perception. Every class is like a call to arms, which includes a drive for excellence in education, success in the corporate world, but at the same time, never forgetting what our true value system is and how we should maintain it in our daily lives. We come out of every class completely inspired, and this has never been the case in any class that I have taken here since 2002 (I worked for 3 years in between) save a few other illustrious examples which include Ms. Lalarukh Ejaz and Mr. Samir Amir.
Another thing that needs to be instilled within our graduates is the love of our country and finding creative solutions to the problems that we see around us. It should be our graduates that are making and implementing new BOP marketing and microfinance models rather than people sitting in harvard, because these problems are in Pakistan and not in the US. Our graduates should be consulting with NGOs or even governmental departments on how to improve their functioning and helping them effeciently achieve their objectives.
Our new positioning should not only be that we produce leadership within the ranks of the corporate world, but the world overall.
I love my current facebook status update and it really presents the frustration that ive been feeling for quite a while now.
We dont give a shit when our country goes to the dogs. We study about how dictators have all but killed our democracy, how our public sector organizations are ineffecient and our governers are inept. We study about how due to no continuity of policies, our country has now become a lepper begging for financial aid. But we dont do anything about it.
But i will. Ive decided to do something about it. Im not sure just what yet, but ive promised myslef that i will help out, in any way i can.
ive decided that once i graduate and am well settled in a secure job, (that gives me a three - four month timeline) i will dedicate either a certain portion of my time every month/week towards a social cause. It may be providing free teaching/career counseling at the primary level, meeting with old people and listening to their worries or even holding free business planning workshops.
Anything that will help the people of my country in the long term. And i WILL do it.
Sent from my Nokia phone
So anyway I recently asked a girl how her exam went. And she replied "Yaaaaaaaaaaaaar, rape hogaya yaar, teacher ne to completely layleee- phat ke haath mein aagayee yaar". Now I dont know how such words have found their way into common lady lingo but let me shed a little light on it....
rape hogaya - probably one of the most humiliating and painful any woman or man can go through - for further details please refer to mukhtaran mai or american history x
laylee - means uve been sodomized
phat gayee - means uve been buggered from behind...yes ure backdoor so to speak...
I didnt really want to write this blog post, but for current and future readers beware...u have absolutely no idea what ure saying!!!!!
I want to change things. I want to make movies and sing songs with a purpose. I want to use mass media to change perceptions, re arrange mindsets, change power mongers and throw them out of government. My latest idea comes from sitting at my college library with songs of Jiye Altaf - a song dedicated to the leader of a fascist organization MQM that promises to bring certain death to our country.
The people of my city Karachi are so God Damn scared of this man that they will never stand up in an open crowd and speak about him. Even the most powerful news source in Pakistan, the GEO network, who call themselves the champions of Pakistani democracy, does not dare publish and run a negative news clip about, out of fear of reprisal.
But I still want to. I want to sing,write, and bring a revolution. Why havent I done it? Im scared. Is it wussy to be scared? Not really. Ive never been one to think too much about my safety. I think the ultimate issue is how my death in a target killing with affect those around me. I have parents who would probably die thinking about how unfair it was to outlive their own kid. I have a girl who im crazy about and i cant dare think about leaving.
But then doesnt everybody? The question that comes to mind is this - how many people are there out there that are as scared as i am? And if we, the educated elite are so scared to do something about our conditions and keep thinking about those around us, who will it be that will stand up and change things?
When i initially came to the hostel, I was quite the "burger" kid. For those of you who dont know what it means (Untill my Alevels i thought that burger meant fat...) its a person who comes from an elite family, talks only in English - essentially people still stuck in the slave mentality that the English colonialists left behind in our part of the region. Essentially a person that does not appreciate ones own culture and would throw it away if he or she was offered a burger from burger king...
Getting back to topic, I needed to adapt and life here helped me out in doing so. New people, new surroundings, and an overall new culture helped me define a completely new mindset and approach to life. Did I leave my values behind? Some I did, but my new approach to life is a fusion of the good and bad - more realistic then ever before.
The reason for this post is that it came into question after an event yesterday. During a match, a person said something that truly hurt me. Now the average person around here would not have thought twice before burying the person in the ground within seconds of the words coming out of his mouth. But I didn't.
I told him NEVER to say it again - OR - I would bury him where he stood, and he understood. Through out the match, and until I slept at night I kept wondering and questioning whether my approach was correct. Was I a wuss for not raising my fists and beating him to a pulp?(and God knows I wanted to). It even bugged me till I wrote about it today.
I was right. If I had fought, it would be a bad lesson for the 150 strong hostelites that I currently manage. If words could warn, it was better than doing anything else. If I had fought him, what would be the difference between us humans and animals? Where would all the diplomacy I had learnt over these years go?
Im better now...as long as you dont talk to me about it again.
